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Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Some of Us Have Jobs

Posted on Tue, Oct 18, 2011 at 1:35 PM

My neighbours are constantly doing laundry. Why? Because, as far as I can gather, they constantly forget that they're doing laundry. So the machines are always going, same loads over and over, like a demented groundhog day. And the laundry room is starting to smell like moldy clothes and BO. More annoying still, every time I go in and they're there, they give me this confused, glazed, mildly territorial look that clearly says "You'd better not be planning to use one of these... we hate any delays in waiting to continue the neverending fuckup that is our life." I used to be pretty tolerant of these guys. I mean everyone forgets their laundry sometimes. But these people spend EVERY GODDAMN night in the laundry room trying to figure out how to keep themselves clean. There are only two of each machine and they've monopolized the entire array. Eventually I'm going to have to have a word with the landlord because unlike these two zombies, I have a job and can't be up until three am trying to live around their nucleus of chaos. I'm aware that I'm using the third person address of the gossiper and not the second person address of the accuser. I'd write in second person if I didn't somewhat suspect these two fucktards were completely illiterate anyway. —Sit the Fuck Down There Until the Machine Stops

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