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Tuesday, July 5, 2011

My Jaw Hurts

Posted on Tue, Jul 5, 2011 at 11:48 AM

I'm basically a really nice person on the outside. I'm polite, friendly and I mind my own fucking business. But, to put it frankly, I've had it. My jaw actually hurts from walking around all day with this stupid fake grin.

I'm sick of crazy ex-wives who never get over ex-spouses and use their kids as pathetic tools (they are everywhere); mothers who never ever shut up about their whining bratty kids. Do you really think I give a flying fuck about your kid and want to hear about it? Is it because I am a woman and 40ish that you think I have a soft spot for your spawn? Zero population growth lady, get that fucking kid away from me. Seriously, you would think that they've done something special or impressive by having a baby. For God's sakes, you want to impress me? Take some fucking birth control and DON'T have a baby! Now that would be more special!

Also, people who can't mind their own god damn business and like to talk about other people instead of examining their own sad, pathetic lives. Why oh why can't they look at themselves and know what they are? I want to scream and holler and say fuck off! I hate people like you, get away from me! But instead, I simply smile and nod and be polite because more than anything I abhor rudeness. How fucking warped is THAT?

So, remember that the next time you pull out your stupid baby pictures to show me, or chuckle when your kid kicks my seat, that while I am smiling back at you and looking at your kid like he or she is the next best thing since sliced bread, I really want to ask you what the HELL you were thinking and oh really? What was that? You don't have a job and you're a single mother? And you're having another baby... oh that will be a difficult road ahead of you (you stupid cow).

While I'm at it (because I think I am feeling better already), to the asshole on the beach the other day that saw me applying sunscreen and politely asked "Oh wow, I didn't know you people burned!" I say to you: Why did you come over to talk to me? It was my friendly smile, wasn't it? I didn't want to talk to you or your old bag of a wife and why would someone approach somebody anyway when they are lying there minding their OWN fucking business? I had to listen to 10 minutes of moronic conversation (oh Jesus, kill me now, he's talking about his fucking kids) only to be topped off with that RIDICULOUS RACIST statement which I completely ignored because I am nice, and then after he left I thought of all the nasty things I should have said to him but didn't.

See how I am? I just reread this, and I was like 'What an incredibly fucked up person" but fear not, my own parents brought me up well, maybe too well, eh? Sometimes I just get sick and tired of "nice". —Not a Nice Girl

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