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Sunday, December 7, 2008

Life in the Large Lane

Another round of fat bashing has come and gone on Love the Way we Bitch. I'm sure it won't be the last. In fact, since everyone loves to hate fat people, I think I'll throw you a bone.I'm fat. Not heavy, chubby, or big-boned. Fat. Size 18 and five

Posted on Sun, Dec 7, 2008 at 10:39 AM

Published November 27, 2008.Life in the Large Lane

Another round of fat bashing has come and gone on Love the Way we Bitch. I'm sure it won't be the last. In fact, since everyone loves to hate fat people, I think I'll throw you a bone.

I'm fat. Not heavy, chubby, or big-boned. Fat. Size 18 and five foot four, baby. And guess what? I'm ok with it. That's right, I went there. I am fat and I Do Not Care. Not only do I not care that I'm fat, but I don't care what you think about the fact that I'm fat. I am perfectly content just the way I am. I have a happy marriage, a successful career, and a satisfying social life. I have good health. No heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, or any of the other ills that fat people are required to have. Sorry. My bad.

Sure, I might get sick some day. And it might have something to do with my weight. So what? Maybe I'll drop dead of a heart attack at 55, while you skinny folk might continue to nickel and dime the health care system for another 40 years after my fat ass is in the ground. Who's a drain on the health care system now, Methusela?

And I'll tell you another thing. If you're a smoker, you can STFU about my fat ass right now. Not another word out of you. Because you, my friend, are the proverbial pot when it comes to sucking up health care dollars, whereas I am the fat, jolly kettle.

Allrighty then. Bash away. Have fun. I'll be over here, enjoying a slice of cheesecake, and not caring.

fatty fatty two by four

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