Director Raja Gosnell takes Smurfs where they shouldn’t go: out of Smurf Village (an alternate universe that “knows no sadness”) and through a blue moon-induced portal to modern day Manhattan. Hiding from evil wizard Gargamel (Hank Azaria with a prosthetic shnoz)---who’s on a mission to extract the Smurfs’ happiness to become invincible---a band of Smurfs glom onto a yuppie couple (marketing man Neil Patrick Harris and pregnant, irksome Jayma Mays). The attempt to modernize Smurfs fails miserably, with too many desperate cultural references, including a Guitar Hero battle between NPH and a Smurf. The movie’s premise is off to begin with and its other aspects---including the acting, special effects and jokes---are so half-assed, it doesn’t even enter the realm of mediocrity. You kinda feel bad for all the actors who aren’t disguised as Smurfs---how embarrassing.