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On Patrol

On Patrol hereby calls on residents of Halifax (the greater municipality and environs) to help fix our city. If something in your neighbourhood is broken, report to Patrol Superintendent Laportno at 422-6278 ext 113 or email: onpatrol@thecoast.ca.

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Friday, February 29, 2008

Grammatically challenged drinking sign.

Posted on Fri, Feb 29, 2008 at 2:24 PM

Remarks: This town has an embarrassing inability to correctly use the possessive. McNabs Island? Susies Lake? Fergusons Cove? No, no and no---that’s all wrong. See, there’s this thing called an apostrophe, a wonderful invention, from back in the 17th century. Maybe we could consider using it. Anyway, no one at Charlies sees anything at all wrong with this sign. (We checked: There was only one Charley, a long time ago.) And we wonder why our kids can’t get into a decent university?

Who's Responsible?: A piss-poor school system. Or maybe two guys named Charley.

Status: August 2008: Probably always broken Since our initial post we have been racking our brains trying to figure out why this sign is still lacking proper grammar. We have come up with a few ideas: They’d rather not spend the money to get a new sign? There is some sentimental value behind that particular set of neon lights? They failed to read “Eats, Shoots and Leaves”? Either way, let’s face it; Charlies just wouldn’t be Charlies if it was Charlie’s. Updated by Amanda Wenek

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Mangled roadside memorial on Barrington Street.

Posted on Fri, Feb 29, 2008 at 2:24 PM

Remarks: Michael Brooker died at this spot in October when, while cycling down the sidewalk, he swerved out into the road to avoid a pedestrian and was struck by a truck. Denny subsequently built the roadside memorial, which consists of a white bike and various remembrances, to call attention to the lack of bike lanes on Barrington. Alas, now the memorial itself has been utterly destroyed by snowplows. This brings a greater poignancy to the bike safety issue, but it’s just a little gruesome, don’t you think?

Who's Responsible?: Doug Denny, owner of cyclefool.blogspot.com

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Monday, February 11, 2008

Broken sidewalk in front of Government House.

Posted on Mon, Feb 11, 2008 at 1:59 PM

Remarks: We understood that the reconstruction of Government House was going to create some inconvenience and we were forgiving---patient, even---when the sidewalk along Barrington Street was partially torn up. But that was in the fall...of 2006! We’ve gone through winter, then spring, summer, another fall and now back to winter again, and still the sidewalk is a mess. The province ponied up $10,000 over a year ago to fix the sidewalk, yet pedestrians continue to trip in holes, slip on ice and muddy themselves in puddles. “We’ll get to it this year,” says Spares, but our patience is worn.

Who's Responsible?: Jeff Spares, capital district senior design engineer, 490-6820.

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Friday, February 1, 2008

Vandalized pay phone, corner of Le Marchant and Coburg.

Vandalized pay phone, corner of  Le Marchant and Coburg.

Posted on Fri, Feb 1, 2008 at 2:07 PM

Remarks: OK, it’s an Aliant phone, just like dozens of other busted pay phones out there. It’s clear Aliant doesn’t give a damn about pay phones and wants out of the business completely. Still: The phones are on city property, with city permits. But unlike a dog permit, which allows you walk Fido down the street so long as he’s on a leash, Aliant’s permits don’t require them to do anything---not even keep the phones in working order. A government that wanted its citizens to have access to working pay phones would say, “Lookee here, Aliant. See those wires of yours, hanging from our poles? If you want to keep using our poles, you’ll to have to maintain the pay phones.”

Who's Responsible?: City Hall, 490-4000